The first year for our family with a model in the midst was a chaos filled day to day blitz. The modeling world has no sense of timing or planning when it comes to rhyme or reason, this we learned first hand.
Things started out slow enough with some photo shoots to build Maddie's book. In the first few months we had sat down with the agents from New York that were out to L.A. to meet all the New Faces. Where we felt all tense and spring loaded on adrenaline, not knowing what to expect.....they were completely laid back, relaxed and wanting us to take a deep breath and let things unfold in a "organic" way. I immediately got it. That everything is going to happen in it's own time and in it's own way. That no matter what your imagination and expectations may be.....the reality is what it is, so better to just take a deep breath and go with the flow.
That meeting was a blessing for me as a parent. It centered my frame of thought, in terms of forming my priorities for our daughter. No matter what my preconceived notions were about modeling, each young person that signs with an agency is going to have their own unique experience. No need to try and second guess what is or isn't going to happen. All that is important is that Maddie is enjoying her opportunities and growing in the process.
The goal for the first year is to build a model's book and to gain as much experience as possible for the model in front of the camera in different settings. As the model builds his/her book, they also go on numerous castings which with Ford will typically be a client requesting a certain look and those models going to the casting site with their book in hand to be evaluated. For us, living in San Diego, a casting is a minimum of a 2.5 hour drive up and back. Typically, castings will give you 24 hrs notice or less. Not a lot, when your a parent with a family and responsibilities and definitely a challenge for any model in school.
Since Maddie signed with Ford in the last few months of 8th grade, we got a healthy dose of what missing school would mean in terms of attending a regular school. In order for any minor child to obtain a work permit for the entertainment industry, the child must meet grade and attendance requirements as well as pass a health exam. So right away, we saw an issue with the school noting missed attendance on our work permit application. And that was just the initial meetings w/ Ford and getting going in the process. So I immediately put her name in for a new charter school and set up a meeting with the principal so that we could discuss what was realistic. Both Erik and I wanted her to have the experience and education that comes with attending school. Home school would be the very last option from our perspective, when it comes to High School. Your evolution as an individual comes from all of the self discovery you make amidst your peers and among the learning experiences your instructors put before you. We understood from the outset that modeling can be here today and gone tomorrow, but her development as a young teenager and understanding her place in the world comes from being a student on all levels.
What I would sometimes lose sight of is that teenagers never see themselves for who they are. Kids are basically mood rings and their color can change in the blink of an eye, depending on who they're with and how many hormones are zinging around on that particular day. When I see our kids, I see them as whole individuals where a pimple or a bad hair day doesn't deflect from their wonderfulness. That's a "mom's" perspective.....but a teen's reality is on very shaky ground. Take a 14 year old girl, who's hair isn't cooperating and throw in a pimple and you've got an emotional meltdown in the making. Throw in a casting on that day and you may need back up.
Maddie had been to a couple of castings but still had limited exposure in front of a camera. Most castings the model goes in, shows her book, chats a second and your done. They like you or they don't. Some castings they'll take a few digi's (digital pics) and your done. They'll call you.
We made the drive one day and went in for the casting. Each time, I could see Maddie's eyes taking in all the beautiful young gals their from all different agencies. You've never seen so much gorgeousness in a room until you've been to one of these castings. The longest healthiest hair....glowing skin....gorgeous features...legs that go for ever....no fat in sight and the majority of the models are about 16-22 years of age and have had time to cultivate some confidence or they know how to fake it if they aren't feeling it.
This particular casting required that the models put on sample clothes and shoes...with heels that were about four inches. The models had to put their own hair up without a mirrow and then come out for photos on a set with little direction. So I watch Maddie and I see the stress and tension start to settle in. I see her gage the other young women and see her try and watch what they're doing so she can get a few clues on the process. But her inexperience shoes and as she wobbles to the set......having only just started walking in heels.....and her hair is pulled off her face so she has nothing to hide behind......it's all she can do to maintain her composure. She takes the shots.....her smiles are forced and her posture is awkward and then she's changed and running to the car faster than I can keep up. The tears start before we can get the door open.
I'm too afraid to speak. If I had more experience myself, I would have known not to say a word because nothing that came out of my mouth at this time was going to help. I am MOM after all.....and Mom's don't know anything. You could have cut the tension with a knife. I started driving and I tried to make light of it but my first sentence was the match to light the fire. The tears started and the pain and frustration of knowing she wasn't prepared or experienced enough set in. I wanted to cry along with her. I wanted to fix it and let her know that this is just part of the learning curve. She was paying her dues in a way and to get through any growth moment.....you just have to get through it. Maddie swore she was done and would never model again. She was humiliated and overwhelmed with feeling 14.
Earlier, I had wondered if her lack of preparation would soon come into play. Ford tells all the new models to do their homework. Practice in front of a mirror with your walking. Learn some standard poses....your go to shots for working in front of the camera. Watch videos to get a sense of what works for you. I reminded Maddie of this advice frequently, but in reality I think it just sounded like "Go clean your room".
We finally got to a restaurant after about an hour's drive. Once we got our drinks I decided to say what I had been thinking all along. When opportunity presents itself....your either prepared or your not. This time....you weren't. Lesson learned. Done. Put it aside and move on. What's important is that every time you go out to a casting or a shoot.....that your learning something. Something about the industry.....something about yourself. What I learned about Maddie that day was.....she's incredibly strong inside, even though she doesn't yet know it. At fourteen, she had the fortitude to finish the casting even though she knew she wasn't up to it. She didn't crack when in front of the camera or in front of the people on the set. She held it together when I know that at that age, I would have started tearing up just waiting for my turn.
By that night, after time to think.....Maddie was back in the game. She figured she'd do better next time and that she still wanted to keep going. She wasn't a quitter and she wasn't going to give up so easily. I couldn't have felt any prouder.
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